I know I haven’t posted in a while, and I am posting this just so you know I know. Sometimes when I have just a short observation I struggle with whether to post to this blog or to my Facebook page or to Twitter. I hope you’re following me on both of those as well! I have been using Twitter and Facebook quite a bit, as I haven’t had time to develop a full blog post in several weeks. I’m knee-deep in a huge initiative at the church I pastor, and seeing clients more often than usual. If you are a subscriber, I hope you’ll hang with me. Going against all the conventional wisdom for growing a blog, I post in spurts, sometimes several times a week and then going without posting for a month or two at a time. I have reconciled that this is simply how I roll, and those of you willing to roll with me will hopefully benefit when new posts finally come out. I do try to post thoughtful work that helps you see with a new perspective and/or challenges your current ways of understanding your life. That will continue, and I won’t just post for the sake of posting.
If you are subscribed to this blog, thanks especially to you. Your readership, comments, and support means more than I can say. Meantime, I have an idea for a quickie I’ll put up right now!
I don’t really believe in this idea of “God and country.” I think it’s actually harmful. (I figured I might as well go whole-hog today and alienate whatever Christians this will alienate.) Before you shut me down, unfriend me, and come to my house with a pitchfork, I hope you will hear me out. These are my views, and I think a lot about this stuff. My views may not line up with yours, and I understand that, but I hope I can articulate them in a way where even if you disagree you can say, “Oh, I can see how that can be an acceptable way of thinking.”
This is what we know about the religious commitments of our founding fathers:
Note: Before reading this post, you might consider reading the one before it that deals directly with the issue of men who don't work.
One of the TV’s at the gym this morning was doing a feature on women who get involved with convicted serial killers and marry them after they go to jail. It turns out that murderers and rapists are chick magnets. Who knew? Of course they only attract a certain type of woman, but I think it is that type of woman I’m talking about when I refer to women who love men who won’t work. A man who doesn’t work, or one who rapes, or kills, is like catnip for some women — they just find it irresistible.
Some may cry “unfair” that I lump all of these categories of men together, but I think it’s safe to say that all of these are considered bottom feeders in our society, and usually for good reason. While I’d be the first person to extend a break, and true compassion, to any man really trying to change, regardless of his offenses against society or any individual, I also believe in calling a spade a spade. Men who don’t work generally are bottom feeders, and commit social murder (or at least assault) all the time by sucking life — emotional, spiritual, mental, financial — out of others and using it for themselves.
So what is it that attracts women to men who won’t work? There are many possibilities and it’s different for each woman.
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“Girls, come downstairs! Mom and I need to talk to you.”
Our three teenage daughters bounded down the stairs and took seats in the family room two summers ago. Christy and I launched into our carefully planned lecture.
“Don’t get involved, girls, with men who won’t work. There is something deeply wrong with a man who will not earn a paycheck. I know you all know kids whose dads are lazy, and who always have an excuse for why they won’t get a job. But this is not normal, it’s broken. If you ever meet a man who tells you he’s ‘looking’ for work, wait until he finds it and see how long he keeps working. Don’t ever hitch your wagon to a man who won’t work. Avoid that like the plague. There is a brokenness to men who refuse to work that goes far beyond simply not working. It shows a complete lack of self-respect, and a man who does not respect himself will not — cannot — respect you.”
There is something wrong with a man who won’t work.
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Wow. Just wow. I grew up in this environment, and I'm telling you, this view is PROMINENT in the evangelical community. How I wish it weren't.
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